Think about the last time you asked someone for something. Maybe you were nervous or worried about what the person would think of you. Chances are that you didn't stop to think about the pressure you exerted on that person.
Psychologists say we are often consumed with our own perspective, and fail to see the signs that others are uncomfortable, anxious or afraid. says researchers refer to this phenomenon as an "egocentric bias." This bias may reveal itself when we put others on the spot, like or . It causes us to vastly underestimate the pressures we place on those around us, and it can have all sorts of serious consequences.
In multiple studies, Bohns found that it was easier than people thought to convince others to do something immoral, like
"People would say things like, 'this is wrong,'" she says. And yet, "as much as it was uncomfortable for them to do this unethical thing ... it was way more uncomfortable for them to say no."
This week: the power we exert over others, and the perils of living too much inside our own heads.
Additional Resources:
by Stanley Milgram in Journal of Abnormal Psychology, 1963
by Philip Zimbardo in American Psychologist, 1974
by Francis J. Flynn and Vanessa K. Bohns in Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2008
by Stefano DellaVigna, John A. List and Ulrike Malmendier in Quarterly Journal of Economics, 2012
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