鈥楾is the season to be jolly, but for many the challenge is just getting through the holidays while dealing with depression and elevated stress levels. But one mental health expert says there are ways to cope.
鈥淭he holidays are happy times for many of us or all of us, probably; however, we sometimes overload ourselves with stuff. And that can trigger stress and can trigger depression,鈥� said Dr. David Josephs, Clinical Director at the Lakeview Center in Pensacola.
Something to look out for, he says, is behavior outside one鈥檚 normal routine.
鈥淲e don鈥檛 think as well when we鈥檙e stressed; the things that we used to be able to figure out pretty quickly 鈥� issues with our kids 鈥� we鈥檙e just not as efficient鈥� Josephs said. 鈥淲e snap, we鈥檙e more angry, more irritable. And it鈥檚 interesting that people notice that in us before we notice it in ourselves.鈥�
Along with the spiritual side to Christmas, there is the materialistic. One source for stress can be economic through the exchange of gifts. Some view this as a competition that absolutely has to be won to impress friends, loved ones and neighbors. Josephs says it鈥檚 kind of a holiday expectation.
鈥淚t鈥檚 one of the big stresses that we鈥檝e all had at Christmas time or at holiday times, is spending more than we have,鈥� said Josephs. 鈥淜eeping up with the Joneses or believing we have to give monetary stuff, that puts us in some jeopardies [and is] problematic.鈥�
Some are coping with the passing of a loved one since last Christmas, or since this holiday season began. The grieving, says Joseph, can be exacerbated when it conflicts with normal celebrations.
鈥淕rieving is a process; we remember the person that we love and we鈥檙e grieving,鈥� said Josephs. 鈥淚 think sometimes people forget that grieving is natural; actually, crying is natural. That鈥檚 not depression; that鈥檚 just grieving and the holidays trigger our sense of that. If that persists, then that can become depression.鈥�
Two obvious red flags warning of problems during the holidays are the use 鈥� or the increased usage -- of alcohol and drugs.
鈥淒rug and alcohol, risky behavior; we do things that we normally wouldn鈥檛 do 鈥� so all of these are red flags,鈥� Josephs said.
Sometimes a tragedy can trigger a depressive state of mind, such as an unexpected trauma. The latest example would be the mass shooting aboard NAS Pensacola earlier this month, where the gunman and three others died and eight people were wounded.
鈥淗owever, it鈥檚 important to remember with trauma is that we鈥檙e built to recover; we鈥檙e built for resiliency,鈥� said Josephs. 鈥淭raumas don鈥檛 mean we get sick; traumas don鈥檛 mean bad things are going to happen to us. But we have to acknowledge that it was painful; it was a very bad thing. And people we care about as a community, and the area we care about as a community, was injured.鈥�
Whatever bad feelings one is experiencing this holiday season, there is help available in a number of forms. Josephs says the first move is to have a talk with yourself and acknowledge reality. Stuff, he says, doesn鈥檛 get better by pretending it鈥檚 not there.
鈥淭he second [move] would be find somebody you trust and depend on to say, 鈥楲isten, I just don鈥檛 think I鈥檓 kind of myself,鈥欌�� said Josephs. 鈥淎nd sometimes that might be all that鈥檚 needed. If the feelings persist then there may need to be some professional help, or your clergy 鈥� who often function in management of these issues.鈥�
One of the roadblocks to seeking help is the stigma that鈥檚 attached to mental health treatment. That stigma exists, says Joseph, because popular thought is that such issues are different from regular health issues.
鈥淢ental health issues are brain issues, alright? We all have a brain,鈥� said Josephs. 鈥淚 think that once we recognize that depression, sadness, even some of the other symptoms that come from trauma or long-term issues, is simply brain stuff that鈥檚 manageable, treatable, and addressable.鈥�
Staying busy during the holidays 鈥� or any other time of the year 鈥� can help 鈥� whatever the activity is that helps us reboot and recharge.
鈥淔or some people it鈥檚 movement; for some people it鈥檚 actually having 10 min. of quiet,鈥� said Josephs. 鈥淒uring the holidays we should find 鈥榳hat is it that really chills me out? What is it that fills me up?鈥� For some people it鈥檚 going to church; so do more of the things that fills you up and calms you.鈥�
When it comes to children and the holidays, the Lakeview Center鈥檚 David Josephs says the main thing to remember is that kids 鈥渁re not little adults鈥� 鈥� they don鈥檛 have the emotional processing capacity as grownups.
鈥淪o don鈥檛 assume that the things you鈥檙e seeing on TV and react on TV, that they will react and see the same way,鈥� Josephs said. 鈥淭ry and shield your children from some of the things that are out there, that you hear over and over again. Things will be OK, especially when bad things happen in the community. [Tell them] you know, mommy and daddy has you; we鈥檒l protect you, you鈥檒l be OK.鈥�
Other ways of coping from the website , make your own holiday traditions; involve yourself in service to others, and keep a sense of humor by remembering the old Japanese proverb: 鈥淭ime spent laughing is time spent with the gods.鈥�
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